Research indicates lottery winners are no happier than people who didn’t win, and in many cases, become depressed in the years following their win. Scientists have surmised that we all have a baseline level of happiness—a range of joy we’ll stay within regardless of our external circumstances.
The greatest factor in determining this joy is our mental attitude. There are ample examples of successful celebrities, who during their helm of career was surrounded by all kinds of people, but at that top level they actually are lonely and finally sink into depression.
Dealing with Circumstances
If you’d like to alter your baseline, instead of trying to change your circumstances, change the way you interpret them. Probably circumstances doesn’t change or rather is beyond our control. It sounds much easier said than done because it is. If you’ve always seen the glass as half-empty, you likely won’t transform into a positive thinker overnight. But you can take one simple step toward more positive thinking.
Pay special attention today to the way you react to things that happen to you. Acknowledge negative situations, and then realize you don’t have to respond negatively. You may even be able to see it as a blessing in disguise.
Mistakes and Incentives
If your son gets into a minor road accident, you have an opportunity to teach him how to rebound and learn from his mistakes. If your co-worker gets the promotion you wanted, you have an extra incentive to show your boss what you can do, which may help you more in the long run. We can’t always control what happens to us. We can control how we respond, which ultimately dictates how we feel.
Coping with Jealousy
Another way of overcoming jealousy involves trying to think about events that make you suspicious differently. Again, jealous partners or spouses put the worst spin on everything that happens. And a lot of things that happen in a relationship or marriage are somewhat ambiguous—events and actions are almost always open to more than one interpretation.For instance, if a husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend does not answer the phone right away—there are many different possible explanations (people are busy, batteries die, calls don’t go through, etc).
Overly jealous individuals, however, jump to the worst case scenario and dwell on it, which just leads to more problems in the long run. So, when events that trigger jealousy occur, it helps to interpret them in a different light. Rather than imagine the worst case scenario, why not try to think about the best case scenario?
Learning to interpret events positively, if done consistently, can help individuals overcome their jealousy. In fact, a romantic partner’s ability to put a positive spin on things that happen is one of the key differences between relationships and marriages that succeed and those that fail. Putting a positive spin on things, however, is difficult to do because old habits and ways of thinking die hard. Typically, this strategy is often best accomplished through some counselling.