Marriage can be filled with pain as well as joy. For some couples, it looks that the joy has been gone for so long that it is not possible to ever get it back. It is very hard to deal with a person who looks to have such a distorted way of working on things.
She or he can show to be passive, but then does things that oppose that attitude. There are a lot of things you can do to start getting your marriage relationship back on track. Change is not that simple or easy but it will definitely change if one works towards it.