Walking the Fine Line Between Aggressiveness and Assertiveness
We all become angry because we try to defend ourselves when somebody accuses us. It is a protective mechanism used by everyone to avoid being criticized. But does it do any good in the professional world? Of course, NO. The people in the organization prefer those who are assertive and not aggressive people.
It is true that you loose stand if you don't talk when the situation demands it. But you should not be aggressive to get things done. You become successful when you talk for yourself and at the same time listen to others when they come up with a suggestion.
When you rage out of control remind yourself that it is a self- destructive behavior to be angry. It is even better to explain things without going ballistic when you feel that the one who complains about your overreaction towards a situation is simply because of his wrong perception about the same. But always keep one thing in your mind.
Becoming aggressive doesn't help you to grow in an organization. There are certain ways by which you can maintain the balance between being assertive and aggressive. But what are they?
Have a Clear Idea
First, understand what you want to achieve in a particular situation. Then think about the end result of achieving in a particular situation. You should also have a clear idea about how much you are going to hammer out the deal.
Don't Shout to Make Others Listen to You
Appear to be confident while putting forth your view. But don't force others to agree to it by being aggressive. If you become angry it is a clear signal that you are a weak-kneed. People will take advantage of this behavior of yours. So always be cool and talk confidently. Your confidence will ultimately talk for you, not the anger.
Be Patient and Listen First
Before you jump to talk, listen to others first. Don't just shout to be audible to others. Instead, be a patient listener. Understand clearly what others say. You can support the ideas of people who share your viewpoint. After a quick evaluation of others views, modify your own views to be in congruence with the opinion of the majority of the people.
Pick Out the Most Appropriate Words
When you start to open up a conversation in the meeting, be cautious enough not to make statements that are directed towards a particular person. Talk positively and with enthusiasm. Ask questions to make others better understand your opinion. Make it interactive.
For example, you are trying to explain to others about the new methods to improve the sales of your product, ask small and simple questions. This will help them to get the point. Try to look at the eyes of the members when you are talking.
Be Calm Even if Your Opinion is Rebuffed
You might have come up with a brilliant idea. But the situations are beyond our control and there may be situations when our views may be turned down. Still don't get disheartened or angry when your opinion is rebuffed. Try to compromise with others.
In short, trying to maintain a balance between being aggressive and assertive is a skill which everyone doesn't have. So try to be a well- balanced person with a little effort to develop this quality in yourself. This quality will help you to maintain a good relationship with the people in the organization which ultimately helps you to grow in the organization.