5 Things to Do When You Hate Yourself
For whatever the reason might be, at some point in time, someone you know well might have gone through a phase of self-hatred or self-loathing. Self-loathing is a strong negative emotion that stems out of low self-esteem and low self-confidence.
Failure, rejection, loss, or abandonment can be some of the causes that can lead to self-loathing or self-hatred in a person. People who suffer from self-hatred hold themselves responsible for any failure or rejection they face in life, not understanding that it is not them, but the circumstances that are responsible for the wrong happenings in their lives.
Self-hatred can lead to anxiety, depression, isolation and it can be difficult to pull yourself out of it. But it is possible to learn the techniques and strategies which you can use to change your thoughts and start to love yourself again.
Here are the 5 things you can do in order to get over self-hatred:
1. Stop Striving for Perfection
One way to get over self-hatred is to change your perspectives. Get realistic and accept yourself for who you are. Stop striving for perfection. When you start comparing yourself to others, you will always feel you are not good enough; there’s something lacking in you- be it good looks, a fit body, intelligence, humor, charisma, etc. Every person has his own set of strengths and weaknesses. Accept your strengths and work on your weaknesses, but don’t let them determine your self-worth.
2. Identify the Triggers
It is important to figure out what triggers you to go into a negative spiral? How and when did the self-loathing actually get triggered? Was it a childhood or an early adulthood trauma that started it? And under what situations or circumstances does self-loathing get triggered? When you identify the causes, you can be in better control of dealing with such situations or if need be, avoid them till you learn to not get triggered by them.
3. Practise Self-affirmations
When you are constantly focusing on what you lack, it becomes difficult to believe that you are a person with some very good qualities. Practise self-affirmations daily in front of a mirror, reminding yourself what are you good at. Tell yourself, "I am good”, “I am intelligent and kind”,” I am beautiful”, “I can do this”. Regular practice can actually help control your self-hatred triggers and get you back on track.
Meditation is a great way to start your day. Regular meditation can help you control your negative thoughts and help you feel more in charge of yourself and your life. It can clear your mind and help you get more focused.
5. Take up a Hobby
Hobbies are a great way to express your creativity and keep your mind sharp and focused. Pick up any hobby, it could be art, yoga, dance, photography, or any form of sports and spend time regularly doing it. Get better at it. Even getting better at a hobby can bring you a sense of achievement and boost your self-esteem and self-worth.
Not everyone is going to accept you or love you. But that doesn’t make you a bad or a wrong person. It is you who needs to love and accept yourself for who you are.