Driving Factor Behind My Recent Success
I have set many a goal and have failed to reach the majority of them. Yeah, totally inspirational and motivational, right?
Lately I have had some great successes, and it all came down to what it was that I was focusing on.
You see, motivation and inspiration are not the same, and yet they are both extremely important. Motivation is an external force, and it is finite. Inspiration comes from within, and it is a never ending pilot flame that just can’t be blown out.I used to try and be motivated by external things
1. Goal Setting
Looking hot and having a six-pack, getting a sweet car and having a certain amount of numbers in the bank account. All are good goals to have, but upon reaching each of them I felt, well… empty.
2. Business Goal
Too many businesses see their customers as walking dollar signs and I get it .As a business man myself, I have fallen into the trap and have set sales goals and have broken them down to average dollar sale and the amount of new customers to get through the door. But what I have found is that purely focusing on these metrics of success that are easily measured is short sighted and not very effective.
3. Set Goal to Purchase Expensive Item
I have set goals to purchase expensive items, thinking that they would motivate me enough to do the work required to get them. And sometimes it worked, however most times it did not motivate me for the entire marathon it takes to get them.I have had an amazing body carved from putting my fat self through enough exercise induced trauma, and yet when I got it, I still didn’t feel great about myself. My goals were to get a dream body, so then I could be confident and then I will be good with the ladies and then I will feel good about myself. It didn’t work – I mean, I got it done and had a body worth taking selfies with, but I was empty inside - Still without confidence, ladies and happiness.
4. Internal Fulfilment
I had an external trophy, but no internal fulfilment.So I started setting better goals, with the intention to satisfy something within me. And up until recently, I had set goals that had the criteria of success based on external trophies – namely, money.Then I made the shift into internal trophies – fulfilment from contribution.
I went from setting goals to make a specific amount of money (and not making it), to setting goals that helped a specific amount of people with a particular problem. A side effect of setting that goal, was that I actually reached my monetary goal anyway.Too many of us rely on motivation or an external source to push and force us into winning external trophies. Look at Instagram and you will see the usual douchey picture of the guy in the expensive suit, with the expensive watch over the steering wheel of an expensive car.
Even if it was real, the person in that suit would feel the soul-destroying emptiness that searching for external trophies to fill internal needs gets you. If, on the other hand, he had a business or did a job that contributed to a lot of people and solved some huge emotionally charged problems for people, he would be rewarded with money. Therefore, the watch, suit and Bugatti would be a side effect of providing immense value to someone.
5. List Out the Goals
It is a complete game changer.He is no longer reliant on external trophies to satisfy internal needs, and as a side effect of giving people value, he is then rewarded financially and can actually have the trophies anyway.I implore you to do the same. Yes, still have the external trophies written down as to what you would like to buy (new MacBook Pro, new car, holiday in Mexico) but who are you going to serve in order to get them as a side effect?
Setting a goal to be an inspirationally fit Mother or Father to your kids will empower you greater at 530am to get up out of bed, than it will to feel less self-loathing about how you look in the mirror. A side effect of that inspiration for a cause outside of your own inadequacies, will pull you towards achieving it, and as a side effect you will have that body image that you desire.
We all want to achieve big things and live a life that we love. But you won’t get it by focusing on the external trophies, because the truth is we all want that feeling of fulfilment, happiness and confidence – but you don’t get those by winning external trophies. You feelings are internal, not based on how pretty an external toy is.