9 Steps to Use Your Anger Constructively
Anger is not a destructive emotional disorder if used constructively. But when you feel like punching someone in the face because you are angry with him or her, you have a bigger problem. Negative anger is very dangerous, if not managed, and can destroy relationships. The thing you have to do is to turn this anger into a positive experience, and eventually solve it amicably with oneself and with the help of others. Here are 9 steps to use your anger constructively.
1. Remember it’s up to You to Decide How You Want to Feel After You Get Angry
Some people give their anger full control, and end up being more miserable than they were at first. If you really want to maintain existing relationships, choose to mind your peace, especially if you are angry with someone.
2. Own Your Anger
Accept that you are angry. The only best way to channel your anger in a constructive way is to accept that you are angry. or, when you are mad at someone for doing something wrong, at least accept that you are angry.
3. Remember You are Angry Because of a Problem, Not a Person
Really, you are angry with someone because he or she made a mistake. If they didn’t, you’d probably be together laughing your hearts out. Instead of channeling your anger towards the person, make sure you attack the problem on hand instead.
4. Determine the Exact Cause of Your Anger
What really made you angry, in the first place? Unless you understand the exact cause of anger, you’ll end up throwing on someone unnecessarily.
5. Remember that Problems Leading to Anger Have Solutions
Digging up the root cause of the problem in question and leaving everything right there isn’t a job well done. You need to understand that the issue that caused the anger indeed has a solution.
6. Don’t be too Selfish to Point Fingers
To find a suitable solution to your anger towards someone, you must never point fingers at them. Instead, examine yourself to determine if you were wrong, too.
7. Solve the Problem Amicably
Talk your heart out to the one who has made you angry. Help each other to find the best solution to the problem at hand.
8. Be Honest and Speak Out
There is a difference between being honest with someone and pointing fingers when you are angry with them. If you are in for a quick solution, let the other person know that you are not happy. Be frank and tell them their mistakes straight outright. This will give them the opportunity for self-evaluation, and they are likely to apologize.
9. Spend Some Time Alone
Spending time alone gives you an opportunity to cool off and calm down. As such, it is always best to go somewhere quiet and spend time there. Spending time alone will not only help you get rid of anger but also open up your eyes to the real dangers of being with someone.