7 Effective Ways to Give Constructive Criticism to Your Spouse
Marriage is an important life-long relationship. There are smooth rides on metalled roads and there are bumpy rides on broken roads. You need to take them together and be with your spouse unless there’s something horribly wrong.
As you know and grow with your spouse, you get to realize his or her shortcomings more closely and you are the best person to point that out. However, when done wrongly, it could result in a marital feud and can get really worse.
Here are 7 effective ways to give constructive criticism to your spouse:
1. Build it Up
Instead of directly pulling the trigger, make a background. Get to the point slowly and more affectionately. If you put the point directly, your spouse is likely to get offended as they won’t understand the point truly. But if you come to the point gradually, you’re making them see a light, and it won’t even seem to be a criticism but a suggestion.
2. Choose the Right Time
You will be able to judge when your spouse is going through a tough time, be it due to work or other reasons. On such nights, your partner needs your support and not criticism. You don’t want to push them further away by being as cruel as the world is being to them at that moment. An ideal time for constructive criticism is when they’re able to lend you their full attention.
3. Include Yourself
Include yourself in those shortcomings and provide solutions that both of you will work together upon. This will ensure you understand how important it is for you as a couple. It will also make your earnestness visible.
4. Self-Evaluation
Ask yourself the same questions before you shoot them at your partner. It will also eliminate all the doubts, and is an abled self-check. You can’t question your spouse over something you’re also guilty of, therefore a self-check is mandatory before criticism. This step will take the criticism to constructive criticism as you’d have thought the points through and applied to yourself already.
5. Dialogue Rather Than Monologue
Make it a dialogue rather than a monologue. Instead of just speaking, listen to the spouse’s response too and understand their viewpoints. It is pretty easy to come to conclusions but it is more important as a couple to hear each other out and dialogue helps in that.
6. Make it a Discussion
Raise the points not as a statement but as a discussion head. Don’t make it a criticism but a discussion about thoughts of each other on the concerned points or situations. This way, you’ll even get to know each other more closely.
7. Appreciate the Goods
Mixing the criticism with some positive points is very important too. If you wish to criticise the way they do a work, you could point out why they don’t do that work in the way they do the others- which they do so perfectly. This way, it won’t even seem a criticism but a solution of doing things in a better manner.
