Does a Positive Attitude Work Every Time?
As the age-old saying goes, happiness is the key to life.
In many ways, it does hold true. Happiness is what everyone is striving for. But without a positive attitude, it is difficult to attain happiness. A positive attitude not only boosts your self-esteem and confidence, but also motivates you and helps improve relations around and manifests better health.
A positive attitude helps you see life more optimistically, deal with difficulties in a more calm and composed manner and helps you bring about constructive changes in your life, which in turn will lead to a happier, healthier, more successful you.
But Can Positive Thinking and a Positive Attitude Help You Every Time?
We come across scores of articles teaching us, guiding us about how to be positive even when we are at our worst. Not that they aren’t doing a good job at helping us. But why doesn’t anyone talk about embracing the negatives as they come and come out a winner?
Research suggests that those who are constantly engulfed by thoughts of positivity, somewhere start to punish themselves at the slightest negative thought! It’s almost like a person cannot relax and sit back; lest, “negative” thoughts start to surface and he/she hasn’t been taught to embrace negative thoughts, feelings of failure, insecurity and uncertainty. Some researchers say that the pressure to feel “positive” is almost akin to personal self-blame, (i.e. if I can’t be happy, it surely must be my fault for not being positive enough).
Constant positive thinking is a sign of a mood disorder, as it leads you into a state of denial of your reality. It holds you back from pondering over or even considering the probable negative outcomes and prevents you from facing the downhill. Isn’t it always better to acknowledge a negative state of circumstances than remain in complete denial by constantly telling yourself “its fine”? It’s not healthy to use positivity as a shield to cover your true feelings.
Another reason why a positive attitude doesn’t always help or work is when you are feeling the blues and a close friend or family tells you “it’s going to be ok”. It can trigger the pent up frustration inside you.
When we are at our lowest, we do not want to hear “its fine, its ok, just be positive”. Somewhere the reason you are low is because you do not see anything positive in that situation. That’s is when you need to face your negative emotions and it always helps to know that our closest friend or family acknowledges our negative state and are there for us, through the rough times, instead of telling us “its fine”.
It takes a lot of courage to take ownership of one’s emotional energy and it always helps if someone lends you a patient ear. Sometimes, you just need to understand and tell yourself and your loved ones that what you actually need is for them to be patient and be there for you while you process your thoughts and feelings and perhaps even vent it all out. Learn to face the reality head-on, instead of remaining in a state of denial by constantly telling yourself everything is ok. It will help sort out things in a better manner.
There are two sides to a coin. Just as it’s important to have a positive attitude to be happy in life, it’s equally important that you embrace the negativity to come out as a winner.
