Personality, Counseling and Improving Your Demeanor

“Still waters run deep”.

This is a common proverb of Latin origin that infers an individual’s exterior can conceal quite a lot of depth of character very much like a very deep river could have the stillest surface. As far as interpersonal relations are concerned the proverb suggests the grave importance of taking time to understand one another for harmonious coexistence.

Passive Behavior

Passive Agressive behavior is characterized by the tendency to delay in expressing opinions, emotions or feelings. The best personality for management of communication on the other hand is assertive behavior and while the two personalities/behavior patterns are poles apart each has advantages and disadvantages. People who exhibit passive behavior often exhibit

1. Hesitation in Voicing Opinions

hesitation in voicing opinions

These individuals may tend to hold on to their take for a while at times this can be retrogressive. It’s important to mention that this arises from fear of upsetting or conflicting opinions and the argument that ensues.

2. In Consistent Speech Patterns

in consistent speech patterns

These people could exhibit inconsistency in their communication patterns. This is not the same as speech defects such as lisps or stuttering but rather a tendency to have unconscious tendencies such as long pauses or terms such as err. All of which distort the message being conveyed.

3. Having Little or no Faith in their Opinions

having little or no faith in their opinions

This is another tendency of this personality that exhibits itself during speech. These individuals will often kick themselves during conversations by belittling personal opinions. Hence terms like, “Though I have little experience with this…”

4. Always Putting Preferences of other First

always putting preferences of other first

This will work against this type of person especially in career advancement. Promotions and new positions are very much about indicating an urge t make a change. The tendency to prefer the backseat over themselves can be negative to progress.

5. Excessive Self Criticism

self criticism

This is a tendency that can and in many cases does contribute to poor mental health and diseases such as depression. Self criticism is normal, even healthy. Its unhealthy when missing an appointment has you beating yourself about a similar incident 10 years back. Plan ahead and fix your mistakes promptly – let the past go!

6. Self Deprecating

self deprecating

These people may use self deprecation as a form of humor. Probably as a result of getting used to being teased by companions. However, it is not the solution as it tends affirm this negative tendency.

7. Soft Spoken 

soft spoken

Often they are very soft spoken and rarely raise their voice and will tend to avoid and display of anger or excitement. While this makes them agreeable to many to a large extent it does tend to work against the individual in specific situations.

8. Avoid Eye Contact and Fidgety

avoiding eye contact

Not always but often these people will avoid eye contact and may become visibly uncomfortable in around new people or crowds.

 

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